Hookie
by Ra86
Summary: Bakura and Marik get an idea. It involes fire, the pharaoh, and Joey Wheeler.... Let the destruction begin! ONESHOT! R


The day was cold and rainy, and Marik and Bakura were stuck in the house…

"You thinking what I'm thinking?" Bakura asked his eyes lighting up.

Marik looked at him through dull bored eyes… "You and I don't share the same wavelength here pal…"

Bakura turned to his friend and pulled out a box of matches. "I bet if we can find some hard liquor we can set my hikari's house on fire…" he said smirking.

Marik nodded. "Yeah but I'm pretty sure Ryou would kill you for doing that! Remember the mess we made in the kitchen last week?"

Bakura shuddered as he remembered the incident… How could he forget… his hikari had chased them around with a knife until they locked themselves in the nearest closet they could find… Problem was, only one of them could fit in said closet… Bakura rubbed his head. "My poor hair, Ry chopped it!" he whined.

The blonde Egyptian groaned, "Oh great… another Bakura meltdown about his 'precious long fluffy white hair'! I say more like white long ass mess. I don't think he ever brushes it…" Bakura started to whimper. "Okay. Where did I put my earplugs?" Marik growled. "Great… 3…2…1… Duck and cover!" the blonde shouted ducking behind the couch.

Bakura started screaming. "My Hair! My poor innocent white long fluffy hair! What has that evil baka hikari done to you this time! Why? Why? Not my precious hair!"

Marik rolled his eyes… "Guess we don't want to see Ry if we set his house on fire."

"Then can we set fire to Yugi's? Or Joey's? Both perhaps?" Bakura asked his whining stopping and his infamous smirk returning to it's proper place sprawled out across his lips.

The blonde thought for a moment. "Hmm… Maybe… Bakura! Find the alcohol! We're going to the Pharaoh's!"

Ryou walked quietly around the school's hallways. "I hope Marik and Bakura are behaving…" he thought aloud.

"Hey! Ryou! Over here!" Yugi called waving to his albino friend.

"Hey Yugi…" Ryou said sadly.

"What's wrong Ryou?" the shorter teen asked.

"I wonder what those two idiots are doing to my precious house… Oh… Is Yami still suspended?" Ryou asked cocking his head to the side.

Yugi nodded. "Why do you ask?"

Ryou shook his pale locks… "Oh no… This can't be good… Marik and Bakura are suspended this week!"

Yugi's athemyst eyes widened. "Wait… They're suspended too? Oh no… this definitely cannot be good!"

The two friends ran down the halls to the office to make a few phone calls…

Marik sat silently outside the door to the Moutou residence. Well, maybe not so silently… "Come on you idiot! Ring the damn doorbell!" he shouted at his pale comrad.

Bakura winced at the tone in Marik's voice. He knew it all too well… It was the famous Marik Ishtar "Do as I say now or else!" tone… Bakura nodded and rang the bell… "I can't hear it…"

"Wait for it…" Marik said softly.

"I still don't hear anything Marik… Should I press it again?" Bakura didn't wait for the blonde's response and instead rang it again, and again… and again… and again… and again… even after Yami had come to the door… and again…

"Stop that," the former pharaoh said annoyed with the tomb robber… and again… and again… and again… "I said stop it," Yami said frowning… and again… and again… and again… "KNOCK IT OFF YOU DAMN TOMB ROBBER BEFORE I TEAR YOUR RA DAMNED HEAD FROM ITS REST ON YOUR SCRAWNY LITTLE NECK!"

"Ra Pharaoh… Don't need to get all pissy… All you had to do was ask…" Bakura said shrugging as he invited himself into the house…

Yami growled at the former theif. "I did," he said angrily through clenched teeth.

"Come on Tomb Keeper!" Bakura called from the kitchen. "O.O! STEAK!"

Marik smacked his forehead. "Sorry about this Pharaoh really… But we were wondering if you wanted to come and set a 'random fire' on Wheeler's place," he said casually.

Yami thought that over for a minute. "Fire huh? To Joey's? But I don't think he's home…"

Marik smirked. "Well you see," he began, "when I set the explosion in the lab, it blew up at Joey's station… And you see, he got half the blame for it. Sure me and Baku's suspension is longer… but Wheeler is home for the next two days," he explained proudly.

Yami grinned. "Yes fire… But I'm not sure if I trust… you know…" he said quietly pointing to the kitchen.

Bakura was singing, "STEAK STEAK MY WONDERFUL STEAK! LET ME EAT YOU IN ALL YOUR BLOODY GOREY GLORY!"

Marik sighed, "Yes he's not the one that's gonna be handleing the fire though… At least not if I can help it… That moron will end up blowing up the whole damn planet…"

"Try the universe…" Yami muttered. Again, Bakura's horrid singing broke through their thoughts…

Joey sat humbly in his living room… unsuspecting of the two yami's and crazed psycotic blonde Egyptian in front of his apartment building planting the device that would change the mutt's life forever.

"You ready for this?" Marik asked raising an eyebrow.

Yami and Bakura smirked equally. "Yep!"

Marik nodded with a smirk playing across his face as well. "Then let's do this!"

"Run Yugi! We can't afford to be late! We've gotta warn Joey!" Ryou heard Bakura's maniacal laughter echoing throughout his mind, Yugi the same with Yami.

"I'm trying! So Short! Can't you slow down Ryou?" Yugi called panting.

Ryou shook his head. "If Bakura is laughing we might already be too late!"

Yugi figured it was the truth. "I'll catch up! Keep running Ry! There's a reason you're the best on the track team!"

Ryou got to the aparment bulding just as the three evil tyrants were counting down… "5… 4… 3… 2…"

"STOP!" Ryou shouted angrily running up to his sadistic yami and pulling on his ear. "I told you Bakura! Never EVER leave the house when I'm at school! You cannot be trusted!Especially not with those two around!" Ryou exclaimed furiously pointing at the other two.

Yugi caught up to Ryou. "YAMI!" He growled. "How DARE you leave the house without permission! EVER! You do this again and you will NEVER see your precious cards ever AGAIN!"

Yami slunk back. "I swear! It was all their idea!" He whined pointing to Marik and Bakura.

They both looked at Yami and Yugi innocently… "What?"

Disclaimer: yes I know it's at the end but y not change things up a bit? Marik if u please…

Marik: Ahem. Ra86 does not own YuGiOh…If she did I'd probably shoot myself…

Bakura: Same here.

Ryou: walks in singing happily What are you all talking about?

Marik and Bakura: -.-; Nothing Ry…

Ryou: Review please! Cuz it makes me happy! And if you don't, I'll give all the flames to Bakura.

Bakura: smirks evilly Yeah…Flamethrower capabilities to blow up the planet! Laughs maniacally


End file.
